Introduction

MEETING TEENAGERS NEEDS

Article 1, Series 1

Great question! This is an important question. I've been fortunate and blessed by God to have worked as a missionary in the field of youth ministry since 1999. I have two goals for this series of articles.

GOAL #1: To answer this question and pass along some nuggets of wisdom that I've learned along the way.

GOAL #2: That these answers will equip you with the practical tools you'll need to meet the needs of teenagers.

I really enjoy building stuff for my wife's garden. Last summer, I constructed a trellis and couldn't have done it without the right power tools. Think of the answers you'll discover in this series as powerful tools to add to your youth ministry tool box. What I have to offer will not provide all the tools you'll need to meet teenagers needs, but it will be enough to get you started.

Youth Workers and Volunteers purchase books and pay to attend conferences to learn some of the information and resources I'm going to provide. I'm offering it here freely, and I'm trusting in God to provide for me and my family. As a missionary, I rely on the loving and generous offerings of people who believe in me and my calling to ministry, and those who come to repentance and faith in Jesus Christ through the work of the Spirit in my life and ministry. (Plus it's kinda' exciting to watch God provide for all my needs according to His riches in glory. I like surprise donations!)

The Old and New Testament Scriptures are clear that called men of God serving in the labor of the Gospel of Jesus Christ can rely on the support of others. In the Old Testament, we know that the Levites (no...not the maker of designer blue jeans, that's Levi's) lived off the tithes and offerings because they had no inheritance (Deuteronomy 18:1; Deuteronomy 14:27-29; Numbers 35:2).

And Jesus said, "Go your way; behold, I am sending you out as lambs in the midst of wolves. Carry no moneybag, no knapsack, no sandals, and greet no one on the road. Whatever house you enter, first say, 'Peace be to this house!' And if a son of peace is there, your peace will rest upon him. But if not, it will return to you. And remain in the same house, eating and drinking what they provide, for the laborer deserves his wages" (ESV, Luke 10:2-9).

Paul seconds Jesus' words when he wrote, "For the Scriptures say, 'You shall not muzzle an ox when it treads out the grain,' and, 'The laborer deserves his wages'" (ESV, 1 Timothy 5:18).

If this Series in any way equips you or encourages and strengthens your faith in Jesus Christ, than I ask that you give an offering to the Lord through this ministry so I can live. I'm certain it will add value to your faith and your ministry. After the series is over, ask yourself:

How valuable was this information?

What would I pay to know it?

My labor through CUPS is to reach lost and wounded teenagers and families with the Gospel of Jesus Christ. CUPS / CAFE is a non-profit organization. All gifts are tax-deductible. Visit our Donate page for information on how you can offer something in support of our missionary endeavor. Please pray about giving.

I've already written a handful of articles ready for posting. So please:

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• Invite those you know who may benefit from this series
• And check back often as it unfolds.

Future articles in this Series will be located on the BLOG page under the Category: Resources...Youth Ministry Tools...Series 1.

Okay...enough said...let's dig in!

MEETING TEENAGERS NEEDS

Article 2, Series 1

Question: "How can I meet teenagers needs in a cafe or through my youth ministry?"

Answer #1: LISTEN TO TEENAGERS

Teenagers have something to say. Listening to them is one of the most important actions you can take. I know it's hard to do because humans care mostly about themselves. This is true of you, me, and teenagers. So don't talk about yourself. (Well...maybe a little, because you are a little weird, interesting, and a bit crazy to want to work with teenagers). But mainly ask questions about them.

Sometimes you have to pry out their thoughts with crowbar-like-questions. But good questions are all you'll need to get teenagers talking...so that you...can listen. You need to come to a cafe or your youth ministry with an arsenal of questions so that if their answers are short and to the point, or they don't open up and talk right away, you can fire out another question; building question upon question.

After that, simply close your mouth, sit still, make eye contact, and listen (James 1:19).

Josh McDowell, in his Handbook on Counseling Youth, lists six important responses when counseling teenagers. They are directed specifically at counseling youth, but I believe they apply here. McDowell's six steps are: Listen, Empathize, Affirm, Direct, Enlist, Refer. I'm not going to unpack what these mean for the sake of limited space in this article. But I recommend you get his book. It will equip you to responsibly meet teenagers spiritual, emotional, and mental needs.

See the word "Listen" in Josh's list?

You cannot meet a teenager's needs unless you know their needs. And you can't know their needs unless they verbalize their needs. And they can't verbalize their needs if all you're doing is talking about yourself and your problems and not listening to them, or (if you're hiding in the corner of the room in shear terror because you're too afraid to approach a teenager). Get up! Approach them. Engage them in conversation. And most importantly, listen.

Crowbar-Like-Questions:

• What's your name?
• How old are you?
• What school do you go to?
• What grade are you in?
• How was school today?
• Do you like sports?
• What is your favorite sports team?
• Do you play a sport?
  • Which sport: football, baseball, basketball, soccer, tennis, hockey, skateboarding, BMX, Lacrosse?
• What kind of music do you listen to?
• Who is your favorite music artist?
• Do you play an instrument?
  • Which instrument?
  • How long have you been playing?
• Do you like art?
  • Which style: painting, drawing, photography?
• Do you like to read?
  • What type of books?
• Who is your favorite author?
• Did you see that new [insert latest movie title]?
  • Do you like funny movies or action packed thrillers?
  • Who is your favorite actor?
• Do you own any pets?
  • Which breeds?
  • What are their names?
• What is your favorite fast food restaurant?
• What is your favorite food?
• Are you going to the football game Friday night?
• Are you doing anything fun with your friends this weekend?
• Who is your best friend?
• Do you have any brothers or sisters?
  • What are their names?
  • How old are they?
  • Where do they live?
• Do you have a Mom and Dad?
  • What is your Mom's name?
  • What does your Mom do for a living?
  • What is your Dad's name?
  • What does your Dad do for a living?
  • Your parents are divorced? I'm sorry to hear that. Who do you live with?
  • Where does your dad/mom live?
  • How often do you get to see your dad/mom?
• Are you going anywhere for [insert nearest holiday]?
  • What do you want for Christmas this year?
  • What's your favorite food to eat on Thanksgiving?
• Do you go to church?
  • If yes, where?
  • If no, have you ever been to church?
  • What do you like the most about church?
  • What do you like the least?
• What's your social security number? (I'm kidding. Seriously, DO NOT ASK THIS QUESTION!)

You'll need to get to know a teenager before you can meet a teenager's needs. It's important that you know who they are, and where they are in their life and faith journey. These are just a few questions to get you started. So good luck! And as my Dad would say, "You go get 'em, Tiger!"